Japan to Hold Referendum on Exiting Asia

Prime Minister Shintaro Nabe has announced that the Japanese public are to be allowed to vote on whether Japan should remain part of Asia, in a referendum to be held next year.

Nationalist politician Shiza Ishibara welcomed the move, saying "The Japanese people are tired of being swamped by dozens of foreigners, destroying Japan's ancient and timeless culture, which has remained unchanged since the days of samurai and warlords," in a statement on Twitter.

Sayonara, dirty gaijin

If Japan votes to leave Asia, it would likely impact heavily on trade with China and South Korea. However, Ishibara is confident that Japan would thrive. "We don't need those countries to survive," he said. "We'll be able to negotiate lucrative deals with the Galapagos Islands, possibly also New Caledonia. And when Okinawa votes to leave Japan and remain in Asia, we'll be able to trade with them too."